Any Regrets? Yes, inside my family of origin.

For the past few weeks this theme of "regrets" has come to my mind often.  I am not sure why, but have felt I should write about it...so here goes...


Regret - Inside My Family of Origin
Without making this blog post of epic proportion, let me state simply that I regret not truly, deeply knowing any of my siblings, or my Dad, or my Mom in the era prior to launching into marriage at 22 years of age.

I don't think we knew how to go deep with each other, to listen, ask good questions and respond with tenderness and truth in balance.  By God's grace my Mom, age 99, is still doing well and living on her own with the wonderful help of two brothers, a sister, and their servant-hearted spouses.
Mom and I have become friends and actually have an "adult to adult" relationship.  I love her and know she loves me.

How I wish to God I could have known my Dad better and somehow developed the kind of relationship with him that I believe he'd have enjoyed and that I know I would have.  He was a great man: kind, hard working, funny, hard working, consistent, hard working...did I mention he was "hard working"?  My deepest regret is that I didn't see his eyes much, listen well when he spoke, engage him in long conversations just listening to him,  or ask him questions about, well, about him.  There was so much under that wonderful man's exterior that I wish I could have explored and known.  I think I would also have enjoyed his knowing me more deeply too.

My time at home with 6 brothers and a sister was spent too much in separation and not enough actually showing love and care for each other.  I would truly like to get a re-do on my sibling relationships.  Once again, I would like to have known them much more deeply than I did.  We are working on loving each other better and knowing each other more deeply.  For that I am grateful.  Each of them and their spouses are wonderful, awesome people with many gifts, talents, and admirable qualities.  They are fun to be with.  Just wish I had appreciated them much earlier in life and invested better in a relationship with each of them.

  Next post :  Regret- Outside My Family