Two Way Street - Not a Dead End

Reading I Corinthians 13 this morning put me in a great mood....still going 3 hours later!  :)

When I read the part about "Love is...." (verses 4-8), my Father reminded me that this love described in these few verses is not simply the love He is telling me to have for others.  This love is His love for me, for us.  That is where love started...with Him...given to us...demonstrated in creation, history, and especially in Jesus Christ, our Savior and His Son, and today in the blessing of life itself.

He is patient, kind, not boastful or arrogant, doesn't think evil of us, and His love never fails.  My love for Him and other varies, blows in the wind, rises and falls, but He loves me all the time.  His thoughts about me (about you) are without number.  My Daddy (Abba, Father) actually likes me.  The great God of the universe knows my name, prepares a place for me to be with Him forever, promises to always be with me and never let me out of His sight. 

I don't know what that does to your heart, but in the uncertainly of circumstances and at this point on the time-line of history, knowing Jesus Christ as my Savior and Friend, means that His life, death, and resurrection have purchased for me new life, eternal life, abundant life, and peace that defies logic.

We are at one of the most vulnerable, potentially frightening times in my life.  In the middle of it all, my Jesus gives me life and breath and everything else I need.  Why would I not love Him back!  I will and then one day step into eternity to see Him as He really is.  As a friend told me recently, "when I get to heaven, I think I will just follow Jesus around and not let Him out of my sight.".  Great idea!  See you there?

Four Questions for Two Lists - How to deal with guilt and hurt... privately

 

Four Questions for Two Lists

Hebrews 12:1,2; Matthew 5:4; Matthew 11:28-30; I John 1:9; James 5:16; I Peter 5:7

List 1:  Using the Top Ten Soul Needs list (see the list below) – prepare to take steps that will grow your love for one another in marriage.

After reviewing the Top Ten Soul Needs list, please take time with God asking the following questions - scripture references are provided if you want some help answering the questions:

1. Father, would you please show me how I have hurt my spouse and our marriage relative to not meeting these needs consistently? (Mark 10:42-45, Romans 3:23, Philippians 2:3-4)

2. Father, how do you feel about what I have done to hurt my marriage and my spouse?  (Romans 6:23, John 8: 1-11)

3. Father, how do you feel about me even though I have done these things?  (Romans 8: 38-39, Romans 6:23)

4. Father, now what should I do as the next steps to healing and growing my relationship with my spouse? (1 John 1:9, Matthew 5: 23-24, James 5:16, Hebrews 12:1-2)

List 2:  Using the Top Ten Soul Needs list – prepare to take more steps that will grow your love for one another:

After reviewing the Top Ten Soul Needs list, please take time with God asking the following questions - scripture references are provided if you want some help answering the questions:

1. Father, would you please show me how I have been hurt by my spouse relative to not having these needs met consistently? (Genesis 2:18, Ephesians 5:21, Philippians 2:3-4)

2. Father, how do you feel about the hurt I have experienced?(Matthew 11:28-30)

3. Father, how do you feel about me when I have been hurt? (Romans 8:38-39, Psalm 27:10)

4. Father, now what should I do as next steps to personal healing and in order to help grow my relationship with my spouse? (I Peter 5:7, Matthew 5:4, Ephesians 4:31-32, Hebrews 12:1-2)

Please note:

Do not bring up old wounds that have truly been healed

Do not judge the sincerity of your partner’s confessions

Realize each of us needs more than one miracle in life; usually, healing is a process not an event

The idea is to heal as individuals so the marriage you build has a stronger foundation

Top 10 Soul Needs [1]

Acceptance - deliberate and ready reception with a favorable positive response, even after failure (Rom. 15:7).

Affection – to communicate care and closeness through physical touch and words (Rom. 16:16).

Appreciation – to communicate with words and feelings a personal gratefulness for another (I Cor. 11:2).

Approval – expressed commendation; to think and speak well of (Rom. 14:18).

Attention – to take thought of another and convey appropriate interest and support; to enter into another’s “world” (I Cor. 12:25).

Comfort (empathy) – to come alongside with word, feeling and touch; to give consolation with tenderness (Rom. 12:15).

Encouragement – to urge forward and positively persuade toward a goal (I Thes. 5:11, Heb. 10:24).

Respect – to value and regard highly; to convey great worth (Rom. 12:10).

Security – confidence of harmony in relationships; free from harm (Rom. 12:16a).

Support – come alongside and gently help carry a load (Gal. 6:2).

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[1] Intimate Encounters, 1997, Dr. David and Teresa Ferguson

I Thought the Children of Israel Were Weak....then I

The longer I live this new faith-life, where everything comes from God's hand....  No, let me try that again.

Everything I have ever needed and that is worth having has always come from God's loving hand to me not because I deserved it, but because He loves me - always has, always will.

This "new faith-life",  as I call it, is simply living in more direct dependence upon my Father than ever.  For the last several decades my personal and family needs have been supplied by my Father through the salaries He allowed me to receive from churches or schools where I was employed.  Now He has become my True Employer.  He called me out of a salaried position - with great benefits and a wonderful group with which to work at a ministry that is perhaps one of the most influential in the world today - to serve on His staff answering directly to Him (and our board).

Every day starts with a decision; namely, will I trust Him today or not?

I need you to know that my attitude of judgment toward the Children of Israel (remember the Jewish people God delivered from Egypt to the Promised Land) has now changed to one of understanding how easy it is to lose a grateful heart, trading it for one that "almost demands" God to meet needs.  When that supply doesn't come regularly and in abundance (by my definition) I can get pretty scared or rather disappointed in God and / or God's people.

Well, the truth is coming to light.  I am asking pastors, leaders, couples, and others to trust completely in our Father's faithful love and provision.  I am asking them to endure when their spouse doesn't love back,  as they'd anticipated.  I am telling them often and fervently that Jesus Christ is the Savior not only for hereafter but also for here.  I am now getting the chance to grow up into faith in a new way, and I love it and hate it all at the same time.  We are living in this new realm of even more faithfully "practicing what we preach". 

So, I apologize to the Children of Israel with whom I used to become so frustrated for their lack of faith and their waywardness.  I understand that placing faith in God daily is neither natural nor automatic.  His Word, His Holy Spirit, His Son Jesus, and His ability to love me even when I fail and drift are all drawing me along this path to appreciate God more as my Father (my Abba/Dad), to trust His loving care more often, to honestly admit it when I fear, and to remember I don't change people on my time-schedule; rather God changes people in His way and in His time.