Several years ago, I made the decision to stop trying to
keep up with all aspects of our cultural free-fall. I admit becoming
volcanically angry as I watched clueless men use and abuse vulnerable women and
vice-versa. My “madness”(gray) has now mellowed into “sadness” (blue) but my resolve (yellow)
is stronger today than then. I am
resolved to be a part of the solution by living a life changed by Jesus and
standing up for God’s love even if others don’t approve or erroneously believe that God can be categorized as merely distant, demanding, or hate-filled.
Before you categorize me into the realm of “religious
nut-jobs”, please allow me to tell you the
reason why my “madness” turned to “sadness” and what I am praying God will do
through Carol and me.
As a young teen, I began to get involved in
pornography. Though many consider
it normal for young men (especially the other young men and boys around me at the time), I eventually realized it to be not only sinfully wrong but also relationally
destructive. I could tell my mind
was getting programmed to “need” the stimulation. It felt good to feel “alive” in this new, exciting period of my
life. Having no one with whom to
discuss this awakening did not help. I was on my own and coming to wrong conclusions that felt
right but were truly relationship-destructive.
What I did not know about “sexuality and relationships” but
have come to experience is that love does not equal lust. Romantic attraction to another person
is not to be unleashed but to be focused and framed in the context of marriage.
No wonder God places such a powerful purpose in marriage and sexual
expression. No wonder a little
sexual experimentation doesn’t satisfy.
I realized this drive we’ve been given by God is a “sex drive” not a
“foreplay drive”. I realize that
friendships can be deep and not at all sexual. Our culture doesn’t promote these distinctions.
I dated wonderful girls that I didn’t even know how to
befriend. I dated in ways that
made me feel like a “real man”. I
wasn’t being “real” or a true “man”. My methods were not even close to being
productive in establishing deep friendships or lasting relationships.
In my late teens and early twenties a miracle of deliverance
and discipline happened. I
discovered that I didn’t have to yield to my drive but could focus it in healthy ways. As a 19-year old man I came to grips
with what Jesus was saying to my heart by Holy Spirit living in me. He said, “David, you do not have to be
a slave to this sin.”
So, the anger I felt toward those who were messing up God’s
plan was simply an outflow of the frustration I felt because I had missed His
love so badly and was on the verge of being trapped myself.
His love softened my attitude toward my own failure because
He forgave my sin, helped me see women in a new light, and gave me a deeper
look into His great love for me and for them. Truly, I could not love as Jesus loves
as long as I was blind to how Jesus saw people. Jesus did not see people as objects to be used but as
precious creations to be loved and known. Shortly after these events I met Carol. We dated more wisely and married in 1972. To this day our Father is developing deeper love for each other and a growing "like" as well. We are friends...great friends.
So my “madness” turns to “sadness” whenever I see others
falling short of this love. When I
see the publicity and commentaries on this new movie, “Fifty Shades
of Grey”, my heart breaks for those doing the acting, those they influence, and
a culture careening into an abyss from which there is but one escape… Jesus’
love experienced personally then lived privately and publicly.
When God called me, and I truly know He did, into the Gospel
ministry, I had no idea what the journey would entail. At 64 I see the path Carol and I have
walked as a wonderful, sometimes frightening adventure that has taken us to
places all around the world and into relationships with many wonderful
people. We want every person
everywhere to know this Jesus who loves them so much. We want to help as many people as possible know how loved
they are and to be able to give away this great God-love to those closest to
them and to a world desperately searching for love…though many have been fooled
as much as I had been.
God used a loving couple whose lives were transformed by
Jesus-love to write a book and teach principles that were revolutionary to
us. We have been teaching these Bible-principles
for 20+ years to 1000’s of couples around the USA and the world. Jesus Christ is setting us free to not
only go to heaven after we die but to live abundant, loving lives while we are
still living on planet earth. Do you experience these truths in your own life? If so, let us know. If not but you want to, let us know.
The “madness” at culture’s free fall has turned to “sadness”
over the plight of those who comprise the culture. In the middle of it all, gladness (yellow) is taking over my heart as
I see person after person, couple after couple, family after family, church
after church, and community after community being set free by the powerful love
of Jesus being “shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Spirit”. (Romans 5:5)
So please don’t just be angry at those who seem to hate the
God who loves them and hold in disdain those God left here to demonstrate that
love, but allow the broken heart
of God to reveal His love for them. Let's go out to lovingly tell the
truth about Jesus Christ, Who will forgive and redeem those who come to Him.
